Opinion / Columnists
How Tech Algorithms Are Eroding Small Town Community Bonds
A software engineer argues that social media platforms optimized for engagement are replacing genuine neighborhood connection with outrage-fueled digital isolation.
My mother asked me last week why I was staring at my phone instead of talking to her. I didn't have a good answer. I'd been on the device for twenty minutes without realizing it, scrolling through a feed designed by engineers whose entire job is to make scrolling harder to stop. This moment crystallized a worry that's been gnawing at me for years: we've built systems that are smarter than we are at persuading us, and we're pretending that's fine.
The algorithm doesn't care whether you want to spend time on your phone. It cares whether the algorithm keeps you on the phone. There's no conspiracy here, just incentive structures that have become perfectly aligned with your diminishing autonomy. The more time you spend, the more data the company collects. The more data collected, the better the algorithm works. The better it works, the more addictive it becomes. We are not the customers of social media companies; we are the product being refined and sold.
The Small-Town Problem
In rural areas like ours, this matters differently than it does in cities. Ten years ago, isolation meant you knew your neighbors whether you liked them or not. You went to the same grocery store, the same church, the same diner. Now isolation means you can know people from anywhere, which sounds liberating until you realize you're choosing to know only people who think like you. Algorithms optimize for engagement, and nothing engages like outrage. Feed someone content that makes them angry at the opposite tribe, and the system is doing exactly what it was designed to do. Meanwhile, your actual neighbors remain strangers.
I'm not arguing for a return to some technological innocence we never had. Horses didn't make us better people than cars; they just made us different ones. But at some point, we have to admit that we've outsourced too much decision-making to systems whose goals are not our own. We've let computers handle what we should handle ourselves: deciding what to pay attention to, who to trust, how to spend our finite attention.
What We Can Control
The hard part is admitting that regulation won't save us, and neither will better design. Not because those things don't matter, but because the problem is structural. As long as the business model depends on maximizing engagement, the incentives remain aligned against human flourishing. So what can we do? Delete the apps. Tell your family and friends you're stepping back. Read a physical newspaper. Talk to a stranger who doesn't share your politics. Call someone. The algorithm won't optimize for any of that, which is precisely why it matters.
Sarah Whitmore is a freelance writer and former software engineer based in Ashford, Connecticut. She writes about technology, rural life, and the spaces where they collide.